Get Down! Get Funky!
by brown-eyedBlunder
Summary: Ever get knocked out with a football? Ever want to? Course not, because then you would wake up naked and strapped down to a table deep within the bowels of the 12th Division. If you did though  you sick weirdo you, then this is what would happen. Ch.4 up!
1. A Typical School Day

Okay then! This is my Bleach story. We're going to start out with a little taste of what we already have tasted for several years of our lives. NORMAL SCHOOL IN THE REAL WORLD. Just a little background thing that doesn't really tell you a whole lot about anything.

OH. And I might switch to a third person schtick if I get bored. Or if you guys tell me I should. Or if you guys don't convince me to keep it in first person past-tense whatever thingy.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing and no one from Bleach. They belong to Tite Kubo. Pity he doesn't like sharing. I only own my OC Annalyn Vance. She later changes her name, but I'm getting ahead of myself now aren't I? Oh, and Marie and Ms. Blueberg. BUT. She is based on an actual English teacher I once had with a similar name. AND I don't own anything by Maroon 5. That's... well, their music belongs to them. Maroon 5. It belongs to- ah never mind, you get it.

OH. And I don't own Apple. That of which, iDon't mind. See what I did there? ^/^ *giggles*

SO.

ON WITH THE STORY.

* * *

Getting hit in the chest with a football sucks.

Getting hit in the chest with a football and collapsing because your heart stops working sucks even more.

Getting hit in the chest with a football, collapsing because your heart stops working, and then waking up naked?

Words have not been invented to express how much that sucks.

I was in English class.

Of course.

Ms. Blueberg, who I swear was so cool that she needed a sandwich named after her, was teaching in her very loud, very strong Bostonian accent and I? I was wondering how a woman her age, which was well over fifty, could possibly retain such a strong accent after living in California for such a long amount of time.

Ah well, some things get so ingrained...

I turned back to my volume of Bleach. Lately I had just gotten so into the story that it was driving me crazy, what with the whole battle with Aizen now being over. Now I had to wait until my favorite online manga site released chapter 429.

I have a great deal of patience, but that doesn't mean I like waiting.

And so, I had begun reading and watching the entire series over again.

Being the lazy person I was, I was only on Volume 21, but I didn't mind.

"Yo Vance! Are ya payin' attention to your work or am I gonna hafta glue your hands to ya pencil?" she said, her dark eyes flashing behind her glasses.

"No Blueberg, I mean ye-... no, I'm not paying attention. I finished my work a while ago." I replied, grimacing.

She picked up my papers and scrutinized one for a moment before slapping it down on my desk to look at the next. I suddenly remembered that I had left a poem under my essay and moved to snatch it from her, but she swayed backward just out of my reach, but barely.

As her eyes moved back and forth across the page she gave me a sly smile, "And just why the heck haven't you submitted this poem to the contest yet?"

Ah yes... the high school multi-district poetry contest that spanned across the state. I'd entered it three times since I discovered it. The last time I entered I came in at a close second for my poem about musicians. As it was my Senior year in high school, I did feel a little obligated to enter it a fourth time. Why not? As Blueberg complimented my poem, I swelled with a bit of pride. The pride was soon sprinkled with concern after a few moments though.

I shook my head, "I dunno Blueberg... I just don't feel it. This one's good, but I have a feeling I could write one that's so much better. I just can't find anything that calls to me. Everything that pours onto my paper is just so jumbled... nothing feels right."

"Nerd."

Ms. Blueberg whirled around, "Okay, who said it?"

The room went quiet.

And the room stayed quiet.

Finally my teacher turned back around and the room went back to normal. "Don't worry about it 'berg..." I said quietly so no one would hear, "Being a nerd means I get my work done, and when it gets done, there are no mistakes. Ipso facto, if there are no mistakes, I can't possibly get a bad grade. I'd much rather be a nerd than a fool."

Ms. Blueberg just smiled.

After class got out I thought a bit more about what I said about being a fool. Really, there's nothing worse than being a fool. For me, being called a fool was the ultimate insult, and no matter what colorful slang term or curse word popped up next, everyone would always know what a fool was.

It was something to be ashamed of, and I was nobody's fool. Never had been, and I always made sure that I never would be. I studied harder than my siblings ever did, checking and re-checking my math (because I really sucked at math), talking with my teachers about essays and A.P. Testing, and behaving myself, especially when all I wanted to do was lash out and punch someone right in the ear.

If you think about it, it's a really good strategy because it distracts a person, what with their ears ringing and such, and it leaves the rest of their body wide open for an attack.

Sometimes I would catch myself thinking about the best way to attack someone if I ever did get into a fight, especially if that "someone" had been a total dick to me. I sighed and frowned.

_'Don't be stupid Annalyn Vance. You don't fight. You don't know how. And you're too much of a coward even if you did. You don't get into fights, you don't get into trouble. Let's face it, you're a goody-two-shoes coward. You'll never do anything daring in your whole entire life.'_

Really, if someone had to describe me, they'd probably come up with something like,

"She's really smart, but she doesn't stick up for herself all that much. Whenever someone bullies her she just ignores it. I don't think that's healthy at all. She needs to lay the smackdown on some of those creeps, if not physically, then at least verbally."

Oh wait... my friend Marie had said that to me at lunch two weeks ago. Huh... Most people would think something like that would have made me mad, but seeing as how she is just a very straightforward person, it didn't.

After she had said that though, it had really made me think.

_'Maybe I should be more assertive.'_

_'Maybe I should learn how to fight.'_

_'I mean, if I kicked a person in the shins, they'd know it but... that's not much in the way of defending myself.'_

I was wandering down to the ROTC room to chat with my buddy Pat, but the big Polish lug was nowhere to be seen. Just some guys tossing a pigskin around.

I paused and dug into my sweatshirt pocket, fishing around for my iPod. Having just gotten the new Maroon 5 CD called Hands All Over for my birthday, I had practically had the thing on repeat for the whole week since. I could only admire Adam Levine and his boys for having such wonderful musicianship.

I hummed along while Adam's lilting voice sang, "You push me, I don't have the strength to... resist or control you. So take me down, take me down..."

Gah, what a great song.

One of my friends waved me over, and with an irritated huff I switched off my music when a voice called.

"LOOK OUT!"

Suddenly a football hit me in the chest with a large thud, and pain bloomed from the impact point outward. I knew people ran to me from the periphery of my vision, but I couldn't actually see anything but the ground at my feet because I couldn't move. I then fell to my knees and landed hard on them, assuring bruises to be present later on in the day. I was choking, trying to gasp for air while panic rose in my aching, throbbing chest.

_'Breathe!'_

I couldn't breathe!

_'Breathe!'_

...

_'Oh God. Please! Breathe!'_

The last thing I remember was that the ground was coming up to hit my face and I thought, '_Well then. Fuck you gravity.'_

_

* * *

_

_Aaaaaand_ that's what I have so far. I mean, I have chapter two ready and waiting, but I want you guys to read this thing, digest it, let it settle withing the deepest trenches in the undeniably deepest depths of your mind. So that might take lik_e_ what, an hour? A half hour? Ten minutes?

P.S. Sweet freaking jesus I love Maroon 5's song Never Gonna Leave This Bed. You guys HAVE to listen to it. Pretty please? I know that might be asking a lot but you have GOT to hear it just once!

PLEASE. Review.

Thankee sai_.  
_


	2. I'M NAKED!

Well, regardless of whether you reviewed or not, I've decided to bombard you with chapter two. Give me a couple of days and I'll crank out chapter three.

I'll probably force you to read that too.

But don't worry. You'll read it. And you'll like it.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing and no one from Bleach. They belong to Tite Kubo. Pity he doesn't like sharing. I only own my OC Annalyn Vance. She later changes her name, but I'm getting ahead of myself now aren't I?

* * *

Voices floated in and out of my head.

I didn't realize that I was hearing them until one was very close to me saying, "And she's been like this for a whole month?"

"Yes."

"Is she dangerous?"

"I don't know. That's why I'm doing such extensive research."

"Does your research require her to be... uhm..."

"Naked?"

"Ehem, hrm, yes. That."

"I have recently begun processing her possessions."

"All of them?"

"Yes."

Now see, the two voices lost me at "Naked?" because all I could think about was how two guys were talking near me while I was wearing my birthday suit.

_Oh no. No no no no NO! This... this SUCKS. This sucks SO. VERY. HARD._

Slowly I became more aware of my surroundings, I was strapped down to a table of some sort, with metal binding me down at the ankles, waist (thank GOD they can't see my privates), my bust, and my wrists.

I didn't open my eyes, because then they would know I was awake... whoever they were. I wanted to retain the element of surprise because even though it probably wasn't worth anything and that these guys could probably kill me quite easily, the knowledge that I had it made me feel a little better.

A little, but not much.

"Is such heavy sedation really necessary?"

"Weren't the Ryoka dangerous?"

"Well yes but they... they're-"

"Captain! Are you alright?"

"Fine. Just a little light-headed."

It took me but a moment from hearing the word "Ryoka" to the mysterious third voice saying "Captain!" to make me realize something else.

Something that simply could not be happening.

I opened one eye very... very... carefully.

Everyone had their backs turned to me, but sure enough, I saw the white robe of the Thirteenth Division's Captain with the Snowdrop insignia and everything.

Jūshirō Ukitake.

But... how?

I noticed that the man who stood before him was none other than the Twelfth Division Captain, Mayuri Kurotsuchi.

Well. That explained the whole "extensive research" shtick.

But really? Did he have to STRIP ME NAKED?

My anger, no, my downright outrage at the gall of that... that... that freaking scientist had my blood boiling.

"Captain, the ryoka, her heart activity, brain activity, and blood pressure are rising rapidly!"

Something in me snapped and I roared as loudly as any Californian Grizzly Bear and twice as ferociously.

Without a moments hesitation I threw myself at my restraints and they came off with the high shriek of a cat who's tail had just been stepped on.

I leapt at Ukitake, pulled his Captain's robe off his back and made a mad dash for the door, thrusting my arms through the sleeves as fast as I could possibly do so without falling flat on my face.

Which was very difficult to do, mind you.

"Somebody stop her! I need to research her!"

_'Stop me? Stop ME? Wait, why haven't you stopped me anyway? You guys are CAPTAINS. You can flash step for Pete's Sake!'_

I quickly abandoned that train of thought, burst though the doors and wound my way up a long flight of spiraling stairs that led up into some strange room with computers and dashed through it while other members of the 12th Division stared at my exposed flesh.

I had long decided that I would be embarrassed later. The important thing was to _run._

As far. Away. As possible.

Sure, Mayuri always made me laugh and he was in my Top 5 Favorite Shinigami and I honestly did think he'd be kinda hot without all that junk he usually wore if he wasn't so disassociated from people, but in person?

He was WAY to creepy for me to handle!

People called left and right for someone to stop me, but when others attempted to tackle me I would duck or jump over them. Thank you three years of Track & Field and six years of Gymnastics.

I finally reached the main gate of the barracks and took a hard right. For a while I kept going in that direction, but somehow I ended up entering a building and coming out onto a long second story walkway that wrapped around to meet another building, which was connected to a large wall and a large gate. The intense sunlight blinded me for a second before I realized that I was overlooking an expansive courtyard. It'd be beautiful if I wasn't so flushed with adrenaline.

_'Wait... I have no idea where I'm going.'_

"What the hell?"

I looked to my left and saw Yumichika Ayasegawa and Ikkaku Madarame.

_'Okay. No. Not okay. I'm virtually naked.'_

I took a quick gaze downward and let a brief sigh escape me as I noticed that nothing was being revealed, just a little cleavage and a lot of leg. Even though I knew it was going to slip and loosen up eventually, I hitched the robe tighter around me and tied the belt extra tight.

"Oh." I said, "Hi there."

I must've been quite a sight to see. There I was, all five feet and five inches, standing with wild hair and wilder eyes, in a stolen Captain's robe that was made for a man that was six foot one.

I pushed the sleeves up to my elbows, as my hands had been completely enveloped by the rather soft white fabric.

They just stared at me. But while Yumichicka had naught but a look of horror on his face, Ikkaku simply looked confused and... a little flushed to be honest.

For the moment I decided I would take that as a compliment of sorts.

A pretty little butterfly floated by, and under normal circumstances I would have been entranced by its delicate beauty.

These were not normal circumstances.

As I saw the two warriors exchange looks and advance on me slowly, I quickly processed a plan that would get me out of their reach.

Closing the distance between Ikkaku and myself, I grabbed him by the neck and slid my right leg forward. Hooking it around the back of his right leg, I pushed my hand forward and pulled my leg backward, tripping and slamming the poor bald bastard hard into the wood-grain of the walkway.

"Sorry!" I called out behind me as I slipped between two other shinigami trying to grab at me, "If I live I'll make it up to you later!"

There were five shinigami heading down the walkway towards me and more coming up behind them from around the corner.

I leapt up onto the polished redwood banister and ran along it dodging outstretched arms and hands as they reached for me.

_'If only guys were like this where I come from. Yeesh.'_

Sadly, there were too many of them and I was beginning to lose balance.

_'Well screw this. If I'm going out, I'm going out with all I got.'_

I jumped.

Not like, I jumped into the waiting arms of the mob of men and they protected me from Mayuri and we all lived happily-ever-after except that creepy bastard, I mean I jumped off a two-freaking-story walkway.

_'I'm going to be captured anyway.'_ I thought miserably as I squeezed my eyes shut and leapt into the air, feeling that strange resurgence of... something that I had felt when I had snapped in the Twelfth Division.

I landed hard on a slanted surface, rolled and came up into a crouch, thinking,' _Man, I thought the Seireitei was flatland. This is about as hilly as San Francisco!'_

I carefully opened my eyes and saw rounded tiles beneath my hands and feet.

No. Not tiles.

Shingles.

I had landed on the roof of the gate? What?

_'Hell in a hand-basket! What is going on with me?'_

It was yet another question for later, as yelling became louder and louder behind me with one voice carrying above the others.

"Lemme at her! Did you see what she did to me? I'm gonna kill her!"

Well.

Shit.

* * *

Well?

Hmmm, I wasn't sure if I should capitalized the word "ryoka" or not, but I thought I should. I dunno. What do you think?

Look, I know this is strange, but I assure you, things will resolve themselves. Soon. And then other things will happen. You'll like those things too... I hope.

Review please, otherwise I'll never have any idea as to whether or not I'm a horrid offense to the writing community.


	3. And She Was Gone In A Flash

Well, here's Chapter 3. It's been quite some time, and you know what? College finals are a lot more hectic than high school ones. BUT I DID IT! And as a reward for being so dang-doodily patient with me, I made Chapter 3 extra long!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach or The Temper Trap's song _Fader_. Both are pretty damn awesome though. I only own Annalyn Vance and that odd voice that pops outta nowhere. Ooo hoo hoo!

Oh, and I know I said I was gonna change her name, but I changed my mind. As author, I'm totally allowed to do that... I think.

* * *

With my stomach churning so hard from panic and fear that I felt like I was going to throw up violently out of all of my orifices, I dropped down from the gate fully expecting my shins to explode upward through my kneecaps and thus hinder me completely helpless against my many, many pursuers.

All I got was a sharp jolt through my body as I landed, lost my balance, and landed on my butt.

Strange.

Getting up, I could hear the cries of "Somebody catch her!" growing louder and louder. I quickly took in my surroundings. Left. Right. Straight. I chose to go right. After a distance I turned left and then after a time I turned left again only to end up in and alleyway. More and more shinigami seemed to pour out of the woodwork, but none of them seemed to notice I was there. I stopped to catch my breath.

Out of nowhere, The Temper Trap's song _Fader _started playing in my head. I stopped for a moment to enjoy it's funky beat. I found it odd that song itself seemed to go with the fast pace of my particular situation.

_**'Ooo hoo hoo, I like this song.'**_

I whirled around trying to find the source of the sudden voice, but there was none to be found. Since I couldn't say, "Who was that?" without alerting the huge load of people that were looking for me, I warily headed farther down the alleyway.

Slowly I crept about and approached a corner. I chanced a quick look around the corner and was rewarded with a completely deserted pathway.

Being as stupid as I was, I assumed that it was safe and walked out into the pathway.

"There she is!" I heard from my right.

"Shit!" I growled as I ran back into the alleyway. Taking several turns so that even I had trouble keeping track of them all, I approached a T-section, and who but Renji Abarai was standing in my way.

He stared at me a moment, scrutinizing me as if he couldn't make up his mind, then said, "Are you alright?"

Panting, I said, "You... you don't want... to..."

"Look," he said, putting his hands out to me slowly, showing me he wasn't going to harm me, "Everyone is looking for you. I get that. It _is _my duty to bring you in, but while we have this brief moment of time, why don't you tell me who you are and where you come from. You're from the Living Realm, right?"

Finally. Some sense.

I was still a little out of breath, but I spoke anyway, "Thank... you Renji. My name... is Annalyn Vance. I am from _a_ Living Realm, but not... not the one you know."

"Wait, how do you know my name? And what do you mean? Not the one I know? Is there any other?" he asked, brows furrowed.

_'Yeah, if you believe in the infinite universe theory.'_

"At this moment in time, yes, there appears to be at least one." I replied, "But while I know everything about this place and many of the people who live here, I don't know how I came to be here. And before you ask, I am not trying to attack anyone or steal anything or... or whatever it is that you think I might be trying to do."

"Why are you running then?"

I froze. I froze because the cold, steely voice of Ikkaku was behind me.

"Eee... Eeee... Eeeeeee." I couldn't even get out his name. It's not that I was afraid. Okay I was afraid, but since I had stopped running and my brain had started acting like its normal goofy self, the very knowledge that I was _here_ talking to _these guys_ had finally sunk in.

I wasn't ready for it.

"Ikkaku!" Renji snapped, "Now look what you did! You're scaring her half to death."

Renji moved a step closer and held his hands out to me, "Annalyn? That's what you said, right? Just ignore Ikkaku. He's an idiot. Come on, I'll take you to my captain, and everything will be just fine."

_'Renji's captain. That sounds nice. They'll keep me safe fromohgodhiscaptainisByakuya.'_

For every step forward that Renji took, I took a step back.

I was shaking all over from the fact that Byakuya, being the very strong advocate of rules and procedure and whatnot, regardless of whether it was right or not, would more than likely hand me right over to Mayuri.

Images of his laboratory flashed through my mind. Steel glinted maliciously and his creepy-as-all-get-out smile loomed over me.

What had he done to me?

"Oh. God. God no." I wheezed. I could feel a panic attack coming on and I started systematically freaking out.

"I scared her? You should really check your vision Abarai. Just the mention or your captain's got her ready to rabbit!" Ikkaku snorted, "And who's an idiot?

"What?" Renji said, "You're the one who scared her, not me! And don't act like you didn't hear me. _You're an idiot._"

As they went back and forth between who scared me and who was the idiot, personally I thought they could both be a little idiotic sometimes, my mind sort of began to blank as I quickly sorted out a plan to get myself out of here. There was a pipe connected to a rain gutter. If I could get a high enough jump...

_'Wait. Does it even rain in the Seireitei? Does it even rain in the Soul Society? I don't remember it ever raining... huh... that's odd.'_

As the guitarist in my head started to rip into his solo, I pulled at my robe as I ran towards Renji, but stopped about two feet from him and bared my naked body at him, taking the moment he was stunned and very, very embarrassed to make use of his frozen body to jump up and use his shoulders to get that extra height to get up to the pipe. With my robe fluttering free in the breeze, I hauled myself up and quickly re-tied it around me.

"I. Am. _**So.**_ Sorry about that." I said quietly, "But I don't have the skills to fight fair. I have to play dirty. Goodbye."

With that, I ran from the two shinigami who were trying to compose themselves and get over what I had just done.

Now, as cool as it is, undeniably, to jump across rooftops and do flips and stuff, I did not find it cool at all, mostly due to the fact that I was more scrambling across the rooftops trying not to trip on the stupid robe and throwing myself across large gaps and trying not think about the increasing distance between me and the ground. I'm sure some part of me registered that it was awesome, but at the moment, it just didn't feel that way.

It felt like I was running for my life.

Which I was actually...

Jumping across a particularly high and wide gap, I noticed Renji and Ikkaku two rooftops away to my right. Three more shinigami pursued me three rooftops away to my right.

And while I was getting sidetracked with what was next to me, I failed to notice what was right in front of me, so I slammed right into of it.

It? Excuse me, I meant _him_.

Kenpachi Zaraki.

He didn't do anything. He just stood there, staring down at me with an excited grin.

Despite the situation and my inevitable impending doom, I smiled at him.

His grin always did make me smile.

But then Renji just had to ruin the moment with , "Captain! Hand her over!"

My smile successfully wiped from my face, I looked from Renji to Zaraki and asked him desperately, "Help me."

He regarded me for a moment, still saying nothing.

Something in his eyes told me to hide behind him, so I did, and with the utmost haste.

"She's gonna run again!" one of the other shinigami cried.

"She's gonna do no such thing." Zaraki growled, "She's coming with me."

I let out a huge breath of air that I didn't even know I was holding, then promptly lost the ability to breathe as a flash of pink slammed into me.

"Kenny likes you, so I like you too!" squealed Yachiru, who was hugging me tightly around the waist.

She then opened her eyes and stared hard at me, not sternly, but the way she just stares and smiles at people sometimes. My friends always found it kinda creepy, but me, I thought it was just so cute.

"Oh, hello Lieutenant Yachiru." I said smiling, "I'm Annalyn Vance."

She tilted her head to the side, "Why aren't you wearing any clothes? Do you like to run around naked? Baldy did his lucky dance naked, but only in the reeeeeaaaalllyy early morning when he thought no one was looking."

I snorted hard, then giggled, then I flat out started cackling like a madwoman. Soon I calmed and looked at Ikakku, but then my **_very _**vivid imagination started picturing it again, and I burst into laughter again.

"Lieutenant! That's... th-th-that's none of your business dammit! And it was one time!" Ikkaku sputtered out, flushing as crimson as Renji's hair.

Apparently, I wasn't the only one who thought it was funny, as Renji was laughing as well.

I got up and mimicked his dance, "Lucky, lucky, lu-ppphahahaha!"

Oh, if looks could kill, I'd have been violently dismembered by now.

Calming down, I wiped a tear from my eye and said, "Oh. Oh. Ohhh, I'm sorry Ikkaku. But c'mon man, I've been running around the Seireitei in Captain Ukitake's robe terrified outta my mind for, what, an hour or two now? I totally needed that."

"Ehhh... wait, how are we getting down?" I asked suddenly.

Kenpachi tilted his head at me, "Since we need to get to the Head Captain as quickly as possible, I guess I'll carry you. Abarai, Madarame, you're coming too, though you'll hafta wait outside. The rest of you, send a message to the others and inform them of the situation."

Everyone but Ikkaku and Yachiru saluted him and I joined Yachiru on the back of the mountain of a man known and feared as the most violent and sadistic man throughout the Seireitei.

It was an odd sensation, being carried like that.

Fortunately, we didn't get lost. Unfortunately, Ikakku kept right on glowering at me until I felt downright ashamed for laughing at him. Renji nudged him and whispered something, and he started glowering at Renji instead.

Hey man, better him than me.

"Hey Annie-Annie! Why do you keep bobbing your head?" Yachiru asked me.

I hadn't really noticed it, "Am I? Oh. I have a song stuck in my head. I always have one stuck. It's a rare time when I don't have one stuck in my head."

Renji sent a sidelong glance at me, "Doesn't that bother you?"

I shook my head and smiled, "Nope. Most of this time it's just background noise to keep me in a semi-relaxed state. Like when you have the radio on but you're not really listening to it? Oh wait, you guys don't have radios...Anyway, this one's a bit more prominent than normal, and you can tell that because of my head bobbing. Such prominence doesn't occur often though... how odd."

I noticed that the song had ended and the last few notes faded away in my head.

That was nice.

_**'Ooo hoo hoo, that was fun. Let's do it again sometime, eh?"**_

There it was again! That weirdo voice! Where was it coming from? I looked from Renji to Yachiru and all the others in between, but none of them seemed to have heard it.

_'Am I going crazy? Is any of this really happening? Maybe I'm in a coma. That seems plausible, right? Maybe people in comas **do **have dreams. Super-vivid dreams...'_

As soon as we got to the meeting hall, Yachiru and I got down off the captain's back and proceeded to follow him into the meeting room. At least, I thought _we _followed him in, but then I realized it was just me following.

Remarkably, the rest of the captains were already settled in. Several of them regarded me with anger and distaste. Others saw me and seemed to pity me, but not in a bad way, no. Mayuri was furious and looked like he wanted to poison me to death very very slowly. I followed Kenpachi to his seat, but he stopped me, turned me around, and pushed me towards the middle of the room where there was one lonely looking seat.

Damn.

At least Ukitake didn't seem angry with me. In fact, he seemed rather relieved to see me.

"Her name is Annalyn Vance." Kenpachi said.

Oh yeah, I forgot I told him that...

Now, facing a man that was several hundred, maybe even two thousand years older than I was... daunting, and intimidating, and nerve-wracking, but I took a deep breath and looked Head Captain Yammamoto straight in the eye and said, "I'm sorry for what I did, but given the circumstances I was thrown into, I daresay that I shouldn't be held responsible. It's not that I didn't do anything wrong, I did, I get that, and I _am _sorry, but I'm not entirely to blame for the events that have transpired today."

"And what is it, exactly, that you did?" Soifon growled at me.

I clenched my teeth to keep from glaring at her. Ninjas. I hate ninjas.

"Firstly, I ruined some equipment in Mayuri's laboratory, which I don't altogether feel all that bad about because I woke up _naked_. Second, I stole Captain Ukitake's Captain's Robe, which is one of the few things I truly do feel bad about, cause I know Ukitake's a really nice guy and I'm sure if I had just hidden behind him and asked if I could borrow it, he probably would have let me, but hey, I panicked. Third, I caused a huge ruckus in the Seireitei. Fourth, I injured Third Seat Madarame, but c'mon, he is so much tougher than that, so I'd say he was more surprised than injured really. Fifth, I flashed Lieutenant Abarai. Depending on who you are though, that might not be such a bad thing, more of a shocking thing, but I suppose if you're of "noble" or uppity sensibilities, then yeah, you'd be considering it a bad thing." I said, ticking off items on my fingers, "Aaaannd that's about all I can think of..."

"How do you know this place? And these people? How do you know their names and their ranks?" the Yammamoto asked calmly.

I sighed, "I can't really tell you the details. Well... okay, I don't think I can tell anyone but _you _that Head Captain. It's just one of those kinda things... Like... if I told you... oh man... how do I put this..."

A moment passed where I just sat there trying to think of a way to put my thoughts into words.

"You may approach and we may converse quietly." he replied.

"Head Captain!" Soifon burst out, "She's a ryoka! She could be dangerous! We don't know what her powers are. What if this is just her plan?"

"Captain Soifon!" Yammamoto barked sternly, "I will ask that you not make such outbursts and accusations unless you have irrefutable proof that she is a danger to anyone."

"But... but.." she started.

"Look dude, do I seem dangerous to you? _Really?_" I asked her flatly, "I mean, look at me, as soon as I got the chance, I _ran_. I didn't try to beat any of you, I didn't turn and fight. I mean, I don't even know _how_ to fight. I'm just really good at thinking and putting thoughts to action. Even then, that's not much. And powers? Do I even have spiritual pressure? If I do, hell, I don't even know. And you guys, you'd think I'd be able to tell that you're shinigami what with your "intense" spiritual pressure, right? Nope. No. Absolutely not. To me, you guys are just regular people. I can't sense didly squat. If I _was _from your Living Realm, I'd be affected by spiritual pressure at least a little, right? Besides, Head Captain Yammamoto could take me out in less than a second with little more than a snap of his fingers."

The room was quiet for a moment before Ukitake spoke up, "She has quite a few valid points. I believe her. I say we give her a chance."

Shunsui, Hitsugaya, and Unohana nodded in agreement. Kenpachi grunted.

I got up and twelve sets eyes followed me as I approached the head captain.

Sitting directly in front of him, I leaned forward a little and began in a low whisper, "Look, the only reason I'm telling you this is because you're the Head Captain and I think, if nothing else, the guy in charge needs to know pretty much everything. As far as I can tell, where I come from is an entirely different Living Realm than the one you know. I don't have any proof of that except my vast knowledge of this place and quite a few of its people.

"I can't tell you anything about the future. I could totally screw up the outcome of everyone's lives. I've _seen_ the _Back to the Future_ trilogy, I know what could happen. I mean, I could possibly mess up the space-time continuum, and believe me when I say this, but that is _not_ a good thing. What's important is that book essentially tells of everything that transpires ever since a certain incident with a certain shinigami in the Seireitei. I know every captain's power, their sword names, pretty much everything. Hell, I know what Mayuri looks like without his makeup!" I said, my voice getting a little louder as I spoke.

"By the way, has that happened yet?" I asked.

"Has what happened, Miss Vance?" the ancient man before me asked in turn.

I frowned, "Uhh... uhm, have you met any other ryoka?"

He nodded, "We have. A group of ryoka came here to prevent Rukiya Kuchiki from being executed. That was well over four months ago though."

I nodded in understanding. That certainly gave me an idea of the current time-line, though whether it would follow the anime or the manga, I had yet to figure out.

I paused, opened my mouth, then paused again. Finally, I said, "I know how ridiculous this sounds, but if you have someone search for a book called _Bleach_ by a man named Tite Kubo, I could almost guarantee that it won't be found. It won't exist here. Tite Kubo might not even exist for all I know! Those things are the reason I know so much. Somehow... I must've been transported here somehow."

I leaned back and held my breath. Honestly, I didn't really expect him to believe me. I wouldn't believe me. My information was, at best, very vague, and even if he did demand more information from me, I had already decided that I wasn't going to tell him anything more. What if I _did_ screw up things? What if I got somebody _killed_? Like one of my favorite characters?

What if Aizen _won_?

No no no, I _certainly_ wouldn't believe me. They would be safer if they didn't believe me. Why the hell had I said anything in the first place? Because I didn't want to die? Well in the grand scheme of things, nothing would change if they did kill me. I wasn't even meant to be here in the first place!

I decided that if he didn't believe me and demanded more information, I just wouldn't say anything. Yes, this was my plan B. They could ask and threaten me all they wanted. They could kill me.

They could kill me.

Oh jeez, plan B. sucked.

But regardless of how much it sucked, it was better than screwing up a wonderful story, right?

Right?

My God, how much of a nerd am I?

He closed his eyes and when he opened them, I could see that he, somehow, did believe me.

Well shit. So much for plan B.

"If this is indeed true, then that means you have a great wealth of knowledge about the past, present, and future in your possession. As Head Captain, you should know that I cannot just let you roam around free." he said, his eyes narrowing slowly.

_'He's not going to send me to the Maggot's Nest is he? Oh man, I never thought of that. I... oh please don't let him send me there!'_

"I will have men secretly search for this book, and this man, and if they both cannot be found, I may come to truly believe you. In the meantime, I believe you said you do not know how to fight?" he said.

I nodded my head vigorously.

He paused and stroked his beard for a bit before he stood and spoke, his voice booming across the room, "I do not believe simply sending you to the Maggot's Nest will be the best solution to out current problem. Here is what I purpose: After this meeting is over you will go with Captain Unohana and she will give you an examination. She will issue you a set of clothes and then you will accompany Captain Zaraki to the Eleventh Division barracks. As he is the one who found you, you are now _his_ responsibility. For now, he will be your captain, and the Eleventh Division barracks is where you will stay for the time being. Every morning you will get up at five thirty and train with the Eleventh Division. I will have someone mentor you personally. At one thirty you will train with Captain Ukitake in the usages of kido. If he is unavailable, you will train with Captain Shunsui instead. At six thirty, you will go to Captain Mayuri's laboratory where he will examine you, _**as humanely as possible**_, take blood samples, and record data regarding you and your world. At eight thirty, you will go back to the Eleventh Division's barracks and go to bed. After an initial trial period, if I deem it so, you will be given the opportunity to apply to be an official shinigami of the Seireitei, in which case you will also choose which of the divisions you wish to serve in. Are we clear?"

I stood and saluted him, "Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."

I turned to go to Kenpachi, but then turned back and asked, "Head Captain, is it okay if I collect my stuff from Captain Mayuri? You know... the things I came here with?"

"..." he looked to Mayuri, who seemed positively livid with outrage, though from what, I wasn't entirely sure, "You may only take three things. You may take them tonight."

I was going to frown, but then I thought it was better than nothing, so I smiled, "Thank you, sir."

And with that, I strode past Soifon and Mayuri and over to Kenpachi who was waiting with an awful big grin on his face.

* * *

Hey hey! How'd I do? I think I did WONDERFULLY! What did you think? Review and let me know!

Please and thank you.

Oh, and hey, do any of you guys actually know how the weather functions in the Soul Society? I certainly don't. Let me know if you do and I might give you a cameo in a later chapter. A MUCH later chapter. Like... chapter six or something... I dunno...


	4. What if?

Yo! Midterms are coming up again, so I thought I'd slam down an extra long chapter for you guys. Have fun reading this one!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bleach or any of it's characters. Mad props to Tite Kubo. I also don't on REM's "It's the End of the World as We Know It." or Cheap Trick's "I Want You To Want Me". But DAMN it is a fun song to sing! Especially if you sing it very loudly. Do it with a DON. Indeed!

* * *

No sooner had I exited the meeting room with the rest of the captains when I was, yet again, tackled by the flash of pink I would soon be calling my Lieutenent.

"Yay! I'm so glad you get to live with us!" she squealed eagerly, "You're going to love it! It's gonna be so much more fun with you around!"

With her still wrapped around my middle and babbling nonstop about how great it was going to be in the 11th Division, Ikkaku walked up to me, a scowl etched deep into his features.

"You know, if you keep frowning like that, it'll stick, and if it sticks, you're gonna have to be happy with looking like an angry, wrinkly old turtle for the rest of your days. And, as I hear it, you shinigami guys live pretty damn long." I said, smiling coyly.

"I can't believe we're stuck with you." he said burst out angrily, "I don't know what the Head Captain was thinking! You don't even know how to fight! You're just going to hinder us."

His blunt reaction really hurt me down to the bone, but I didn't dare let him or anyone else know that. I smiled brightly, "Is it really so easy to eavesdrop on your guys' captains like that? Don't you, like... get in trouble for such naughty spy-work?"

His eyes widened and he barked in defense, "Whuh-we weren't spying! We could hear you from outside."

"Nuh-uh! I was whispering to the Head Captain for most of the time!" I barked back, eyes flaring.

Yachiru tried to climb up onto my back with little success, and said, "We had something in there that could listen in!"

"You are too loud Lieutenant." Yumichika said, suddenly appearing out of nowhere, "We don't need anyone knowing we were spying."

"Does it really matter anymore?" Rangiku piped from behind. She sauntered over to me and pried Yachiru from my waist. Then she hugged me.

It was surprising... but it wasn't surprising. It was very... Rangiku, I suppose.

"I am sooo sorry in advance for anything mean or incredibly tactless these two idiots say to you." she said, putting emphasis on "mean or incredibly tactless" and staring down Ikakku.

He rolled his eyes.

She pulled away from me and looked at me with a deep concern in her eyes.

"What was it like?" Rangiku said quietly, "When you... uhm... "

"You mean when I woke up? Naked?" I replied, looking down at myself for what seem like the millionth time. I sighed heavily, "Mere words cannot describe such a feeling in such a predicament. Hmm... it was horrifying, embarrassing, undeniably creepy, and incredibly... just... well, weird in general. Something I would never, ever want to experience again. For any reason. Not to save my life, or someone else's life, or... well... okay, maybe if it were to save someone else's life, but they'd have to mean a hell of a lot to me in order for me to do it. You guys get the idea though, right?"

Renji stared at me with his head half-cocked, "Has anyone ever told you you ramble?"

I nodded and hung my head, feeling rather ashamed that I kept on doing that. If I wasn't careful, soon I'd just be known as the girl who talked too much.

Like always.

"Sooo..." Renji said, "is it true?"

"Uhh..."

"What you said. About knowing... about stuff. Like everything." he said, quickly clarifying.

Everyone crowded closer to me. Except Ikkaku. He angrily stomped his way towards the door, then turned, crossed his arms and fixed his gaze determinedly on Yuichika. Seriously, the guy didn't seem to want anything to do with me. What was up with that?

I shook my head, both in confusion, and in reply to Renji's statement, "No. Well, I mean yes. I mean... uhm... I only know certain things about certain people. Plus I know the future as more of a... a collective whole. Little teeny tiny details, like what say... Captain Hitsugaya, is going to do every day... that stuff I don't know."

Captain Unohana came up to me and smiled sweetly. For all the times she was creepy, it was just so difficult not to like her that I decided not to care about her more twisted side.

"If you would please accompany me to the 4th Division Barracks, we can get your examination under way." she said, "I trust that you aren't injured severely, so it should be quite quick."

I smiled in reply, "Sure!"

I followed her and her lieutenant to the medical wing of their barracks. Or at least, I tried to follow, but I suddenly... felt... tired.

The world seemed to tilt on its axis for a moment before I heard a dull thud and it settled into an odd diagonal position.

"M'really... tired." I murmured slowly, my voice sounding thousands of miles away.

"What the hell was that, girlie?" I heard Ikakku yell, but the noises around me seemed to dull and fade in and out.

Then _everything_ faded out. Sight. Sound. Smell.

Everything.

When I next opened my eyes, I could see Captain Unohana's Captain's Robe next to me, and next to her was Captain's Ukitake and Shunsui. I groaned as I tried to sit up but found myself unable to.

"Ahh well look here. Good evening pretty little miss. Sleep well?" Captain Shunsui asked with a soft voice and a warm, lazy smile.

I always liked that about him.

"Sleep?" I murmured.

He nodded, and Ukitake said, "You wobbled for a second and then just... toppled over and passed out. It's only been a few hours."

I looked at the Thirteenth Division Captain for a moment, then said, "Hey, you have your Captain's Robe back. Sorry again, by the way."

He waved it off, "I don't blame you for what you did. I was more concerned that you were going to be hurt by one of the other officers."

I realized I was wearing a standard issue uniform under the covers of the bed, and as I struggled to sit up, Captain Unohana turned to me and said, "Do you feel pain anywhere?"

"Nah." I said, "Just really tired."

She mused for a moment, then said, "You have a few cuts and bruises, but it seems that nothing I have done seems to heal you. It is as though you have not reiatsu for me to restore. It has resulted in my treating you with bandages and medicinal herbs."

"I really can sense no spiritual pressure from you. It is as though you do no exist. Spiritually speaking." she added, smiling, "Do not worry though, I'm sure Captain Mayuri will be able to come up with a solution."

I whimpered.

Getting up, I found myself a bit unsteady on my feet as I wobbled and then sat down again.

"Is it alright to go get my things from the Captain now? Uhm... plus, I guess he could get a start on to why I don't seem to exist... spiritually speaking." I asked, flashing a little half smile.

Yeah, I was soooo not going to tell him that. Ha ha, no. No no, super no, heck no, just... no. As much as I would love to know the answers, and I would, because hey, it seemed like I was going to be here for a while, I was not going to be letting Mayuri know that. At least not today. Maybe tomorrow.

I just got off that stupid table, there's no way I want to get back on it. At least, until I'm ordered to or my curiosity gets the better of me.

Probably a mixture of both.

Captain Unohana nodded, "As there seems to be nothing else I can do, I suppose I will discharge you from my care. Should you feel lightheaded, have the person nearest you bring you straight back here, understand?"

"Yes Captain, thank you." I replied, getting up again, but more slowly this time.

"See you tomorrow little miss." Shunsui said with a smile, "Captain Ukitake and I will be waiting."

I giggled lightly as Ukitake added, "I'll be sure to send one of my Lieutenants for you."

As I left the 4th Division, the sun was beginning to set, and the last of its rays seemed to cry out in one final stubborn protest, throwing gold and red into the air and setting the evening sky on fire.

"Beautiful." I murmured, a lazy smile on my lips.

"Hah, you don't know what true beauty is." Yumichika scoffed as he made his way towards me. Ikkaku was beside him, but he certainly didn't seem happy about it.

"What's got you all in a huff Ikkaku?" I asked, my lazy smile fading.

He growled, "That's Third Seat Madarame to you, girlie. I could be enjoying this great evening training in the yard, or the dojo, or our drinking with the others, but no, I have to come here and escort you to the 12th Division instead!"

A bit confused, I said, "Escort me?"

Yumichika interrupted Ikkaku before he had a chance to speak again, "Because of today's earlier incidents, we have been assigned to escort you to and from the 12th Division. Every evening."

Gears turned and pistons... pistoned and slowly things clicked in my head. They would've clicked a whole lot faster had I not been so tired.

"Awesome!" I said, smiling my warmest.

As we walked, Yumichika asked me what I was going to the 12th Division for tonight and I told him. I didn't like the idea of going back there tonight, let alone every night, but having both Yumichika and Ikkaku with me certainly made me feel better.

I also talked to Yumichika about what the 11th Division did during the day. Turns out, it was mostly all training, fights breaking out, sparring matches, more training, eating, running errands, more fights breaking out, and more sparring matches. The 11th Division seemed to be a poster child for working out. Well that and violence. Of course, for higher ranking officers like Ikkaku and himself, there was also paperwork to do. And because of how lazy Captain Kenpachi was with his paperwork, there was a lot of it.

"Just when I think that I can catch a break in the early afternoon, BANG, something happens, and then there's more paperwork to do." he said, being rather melodramatic about it, " Occasionally it causes me extreme stress, and stress isn't beautiful at all. Oh, I wish it would end!"

_'It's the end of the world as we know it. It's the end of the world as we know it. It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine.'_

Dammit. Stop that.

I tried to get the song unstuck from my head by shaking it back and forth. Awesome, nice and out of my mind. Then I chuckled, "Nothing ends Yumichika. Nothing ever ends."

He smiled at me then, saying, "You know, that almost sounded like it came from an omnipotent, omnipresent being. But then we look over and its just you."

I laughed at his words, and seeing I bore him no ill will, he laughed as well. It felt really strange, because I had always thought that I'd be able to win over Ikkaku with my ridiculous likability and endearing sense of humor.

Pity. He really was one of my favorites... course, he wasn't up there with Kenpachi, Chad, Mayuri, or Hisagi, but...

I really would like to be friends with the baldy.

Maybe there's still hope?

...

...

Anyone? Feel free to chime in now. Any time you like.

_'Yeah, of course there's hope. There's always hope. After all, I may not have won over Ikkaku, but if I could get Yumichika on my side, nothing is impossible.'_

... yeah, that sounds good.

"Annalyn Vance." he said as he calmed down, "That's such a strange name, but it rolls of the tongue very nicely. I think it is a beautiful name. But it's still a bit strange, so it's only slightly beautiful."

"Really? Well... I've never... I've never had someone say that about my name before. Thanks Yumichika. I like it because it's not common." I replied, "I mean, it sounds like it would be, because "Anna" is a common name where I come from, but then there's that "Lyn" part to make the name stand out and stuff."

We reached the 12th Division in about twenty minutes, which felt so strange because hours ago I'd been so confused and turned around it felt like it took ages to get out of there.

Nemu, who was standing next to the gate, said, "Captain Mayuri has been waiting for you Annalyn Vance. Have you chosen your three items?"

I swallowed hard, "I'm still working on it."

She said nothing, but turned and then said, "Follow me."

We followed her, but as we went through room after room I became more and more uneasy. When we descended down the staircase to that... that place where I'd been held, I had the very strong urge to cry and throw up violently. And at the same time too.

I stopped, swaying a bit, then sat on the steps and took a few deep, slow breaths.

"Annalyn?" Yumichika said, tentatively putting a hand on my head, "You seem ill."

"It's okay." I muttered quickly, "I'm okay. It's alright. I'm okay. I just... I need to. Just. Calm. Down. Calm down Vance. It's gonna be okay. You're fine. You're with Ikkaku and Yumichika for Pete's Sake. They're super strong. They can fight. They're amazing fighters. Calm. Stay. Calm. Shhh, shhhh shh shhhhh. It's okay."

An overwhelming sense of impending doom seemed to hover just above me, and it was a few minutes before I could finally stand again and continue on and not freak out as I looked at our destination below.

"Hoooo. Okay. Okay. I'm good." I said, being very careful not to look at either one of them.

"What the hell was that?" Ikakku said, casting a sidelong glance my way.

"Panic attack. Well, almost. I mean, technically, panic attacks aren't caused by anything in particular, but sometimes there are things that trigger panic attack-esque symptoms within me, so that's what I call them." I said quickly, "I know... it's... weird. But! Uhm... they don't happen very often. Not at all."

Ikakku's brow furrowed, absorbing and processing the information.

"M'sorry." I murmured, continuing down the stairs.

When we all stepped out into the laboratory, I realized that it was actually quite spacious. The table upon which I had been held was... for lack of a better term, busted.

I still can't believe I did that. I mean, how? Where did all that strength come from?

"You did quite a number on my examination table, Vance." Mayuri said, not turning away from his computer. The monitor was just huge, and honestly, I was beginning to wonder how his skin was so tan beneath all that makeup he wore. Most people who sit in front of computers all day, every day would be extremely pale, and some of the most extreme cases I'd seen, people would be almost tinged a sickly pale white-ish yellow.

What kind of makeup was it anyway? It seemed so smooth, and after prolonged exposure to the monitor, I figured it would've dried out and cracked a little by now.

"You possessions are there." he continued, pointing a single finger at a long table about ten feet from his left, "Choose your three items."

It was very cold in the room and I shivered. Now, walking in any direction towards him had my entire body screaming in protest, but as my body continued to shake, I realized it wasn't from the cold. I walked over to the table anyway and took a gander at my things.

Each of my things had been scrupulously placed out and carefully put in some sort of order. My clothes were all layed out, the pockets turned out, and the contents of my pants pockets had been carefully placed beside them. The first thing I picked up was my underwear. Because really, the thought that Mayuri had and was examining my _**underwear**_ really freaked me out.

Still not looking away from the screen, he asked, "What is your first item?"

"M-m-my... my under... wear." I replied shakily, the tremors in my body continuing to grow in severity. I quickly stuffed them in my pocket as best as I could, just in case Yumichika and Ikkaku were watching.

It didn't really matter what I did as Mayuri, that evil scientific genius bastard, went taka-taka-tak on his keyboard and pulled up an image of my underwear.

"Black. Lace, cotton, silk, and some other fabric. Rather mature for one your age, but I'm not one to judge on such trivial matters. I will constitute both pieces, despite being two things, as one item." he said, his fingers going taka-taka-taka on the keyboard, "Choose your next item."

I had to pause for a moment and close my eyes. Squeezing them shut tightly, I told myself to calm the hell down and think carefully.

What would be the best item to choose? C'mon, think dammit! This is important!

OH!

Opening my eyes, I moved over to where the contents of my backpack had been placed and searched for the book. Volume 21 of Bleach. If Mayuri had found it, had looked in it, he would know that what I said was true! If he hadn't found it, I could show him, and I could show the Head Captain! They would believe me!

But then... was that a good thing?

I looked through my things, then looked again, but it was... gone.

Gone. The book was gone. But how?

"Uhm... there should be... an-n-nother book ... here." I said slowly.

This caused the scientist to turn away from his monitor screen to stare at me. The light thrown off by the computer cast him in an eerie glow.

"Really?" he said, his smile turning to a frown, "How very... peculiar. Tell me, what does this book look like?"

"It's... it's ahh.." I started, then I paused and took a deep breath, "Head Captain Yammamoto has you searching for something, yes?"

Mayuri walked towards me slowly, stopping only inches from my face. In an irritated voice, he said, "I believe the Head Captain is having me search for two things that you say should not exist. I find the task to be particularly pointless, but orders are orders I suppose."

I nodded slowly, trying to resist the urge to cower in fear.

"One of these items is a book, and the other is a person. These two items are related, I presume." he continued.

I nodded again, noting how his breath was rather minty. Not like it was strong or anything, but it was... oddly pleasant. It was mint, but it wasn't mint. Vanilla Mint. That's what it was. Why do I always notice the most random things?

I was going to compliment him on it, but then I thought better of it. I mean, who compliments a person on how their breath smells?

"You had this this book... in your possession?" he asked, vanilla mint breath washing over me rather... pleasantly.

"I did. It may prove one of two possibilities." I said, "Either the book cannot exist on this plane of... existence, or it can and someone... took it."

He stared hard at me, his wide eyes analyzing my facial features, reading my expression like an open book. He saw my fear of him, and really, who wouldn't? It could only be more obvious if there was a neon sign above my head. But he also seemed to see something else. Something, that it looked like, he couldn't really get a grasp on.

Something that confused him.

"Do you believe that I have taken it?" he asked slowly, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

I shook my head, my hair brushing against his face lightly, "You would have no reason to. Should it hold the key, or even _**be **_the key to _**my **_getting home, one could further deduce that it may also be a key to getting to my Living World _**in general. **_As in,_** anyone could get there**_. As far as I know, you've never set foot in your own Living World. Not yet anyway. I mean, in the future you will, but so far, no, no you haven't. Why would you want to go to mine if you haven't even been to yours yet? It's completely illogical, I mean, you're a freaking scientist. It's completely illogical. My world's not much different as far as I know. Well, okay, there are some major differences, but I won't go into that now."

Silence.

"But it's also possible that I could be... crazy. Though that is extremely unlikely. I could tell you everything about this book and its contents, and they would surely come to pass." I said slowly, "But it was white, and it had the number twenty-one on it, and... it had a picture of a person who you may know. Shinji Hirako. Of course, it'd be a new look to you, as he's wearing normal human clothes and... uhm... his hair is much shorter. He has a nice smile by the way. Very... unique. Kinda like yours except... uhm, nevermind. Shutting up."

Had I said too much? Had I royally blown it? Had Mayuri noticed I'd partially complimented him on his smile despite the fact that his teeth were the oddest shade of yellow... yellow orchre... possibly gold? More importantly, had I possibly messed up something for this world?

Wait.

What if I'm _**supposed **_to tell him these things? Is that likely? No. Not a snowball's chance in the deepest depths of Hell.

Though... I'm here. And was there ever a snowball's chance in the deepest depths of Hell of all _**this **_happening to me?

Well... it does freeze in Hell, Massachusetts.

"Shinji... Hirako... you say?" Mayuri replied, tilting his head to the side, "How very... intriguing."

His stare held me in its grip, and saying that I felt uncomfortable was like saying that sitting on a porcupine was a pain in the ass.

Quickly I turned and tore my gaze away from his, "That would've been my second object, but as it's not here... I'll choose this.

I picked up my music player, the deep green of its metal reflecting and glinting as I turned this way and that, checking for any severe damages.

_'It should still be fully charged.'_ I thought, wrapping the ear-buds around it and stuffing it in my pocket.

"I do not know what that item is. Inform me." Mayuri said, still staring at me and still very much violating my personal space.

"It... uhm..." I started, spasms once again beginning to wreak havoc throughout my body, "I-it plays music. It is a p-portable music player... and uhm... that's about it."

He did a quick turn on his heel and moved back to the computer, bringing up an image of my mp3 and typing the words "Music Player, plays music." into its description, then paused, then added "Portable." beneath it.

As for my third item... what to choose what to choose? I looked over everything carefully. I could do without my school supplies, but was there anything that I really need to take with me?

I picked up an old red folder, its contents messily placed inside. My drawings were there, my many many doodles and pictures from days of boredom, joy, and fear. As I recalled, there were also a few poems I'd written there as well. Then I noticed my scarf off to the left. My favorite scarf. It was about two feet longer than I was tall, and made of the most gorgeous fiery red fabric I'd ever seen.

If there's one thing about me that my friends know, it's that I had a thing for long socks and for scarves, and was proud to say I owned more than ten scarves of all materials and colors.

I put the folder down carefully, gazing longingly at my scarf. It was made of some sort of strange material, soft as my polyester comforter at home and more durable than my favorite pair of steel-toe boots. I remember the first time I had seen it while walking home. It had been so expensive. I never could've afforded it.

A really good friend of mine had given it to me before... before he died.

'Jeremy_.'_ I whispered quietly.

I was so torn between the two items that I just stood there for ten minutes wondering what to do.

"Wouldja hurry it up already!" Ikakku yelled from across the room, "We need to get back to the barracks for dinner!"

As much as it hurt me to do, I tore my eyes away from my scarf and picked up my folder. "I choose this as my third item. My folder full of drawings."

"Very well." Captain Mayuri said, "In the meantime I will process these possessions and keep them with me until such time that I am satisfied with my research. You will be here tomorrow evening. Do not be late."

"Yes... Captain Mayuri." I said sadly, turning away from my scarf.

"And Vance." he said behind me.

I turned slowly, fearful that he would take back what little normalcy that was my possessions I had, "Yes... Captain Mayuri?"

"Bring the folder." he said.

We walked up the stairs in silence, Yumichika, Ikkaku, and I did. It wasn't until we had left the 12th Division that Ikkaku said something.

"That scarf means a lot to you, doesn't it?" he asked with a bit of irritance in his voice.

I smiled a small, sad little smile, "Yeah. It does. It was a... gift."

"You'll get it back eventually." Yumichika said, "Don't worry about it. So, what was that other stuff you chose? Besides your... undergarments."

I felt my face flush with embarrassment and I hid my head with my folder momentarily, "That was really... awkward, by the way. I can't believe he did that! I'm... I'm really sorry you guys had to see that."

"It could've been worse." he replied.

I stared at him, brows knitted, "How? Two guys that I'm probably going to be spending a lot of time with just saw my underwear. Praytell, could it be worse?"

He stopped, opened his mouth, closed it, then said, "Not sure. But I'm sure it could have."

I huffed, "The second thing I chose was my mp3."

I pulled it from my pocket and unraveled it for them to see, "You take these two ear-buds and put them in your ears. Then you press this button to turn it on and you find a song you like and press this button to play it. Course, you have to charge it after a while, but mine's all charged up, so I won't have to worry about it."

Re-wrapping the buds as we continued on, I said, "Music is important to me. It's... really helped me get through some pretty rough spots. But you probably don't want to hear about that; anyway my third item was this old, tattered folder full of my drawings and poems."

"Pity I can't just have all my stuff back." I growled, wanting to punch something.

"You look like you want to punch something." Ikkaku muttered, "Too bad you can't fight, eh?"

I nodded, becoming only more moody, "Wonder who they're gonna stick me with for a teacher..."

"Well it ain't gonna be me." Ikkaku said proudly smiling for the first time since I'd met him, "I made it clear to the Captain that Yumichika and I won't teach you."

I snorted, then smirked, "Ha ha, well that's probably because you can't. Now, Yumichika, that's an entirely different story. You heard him on the way here; Lots of paperwork to do."

Yumichika laughed and I decided to throw something else out to tease Ikkaku. Of course, I knew full well that Ikkaku could use his Bankai and just chose not to because people would want him to fill in the empty Captain positions or something.

"But you know what? It's cool with me. I mean it's not like you can use Bankai or anything." I said, smiling coyly and giving him a knowing look.

Unfortunately he didn't seem to notice that look or that smile and he completely failed to understand that I _knew_ and he totally blew up at me.

"You can't learn Bankai without knowing how to fight first." he barked, " And you know what, at least I can actually put up a fight! You wouldn't last two seconds!"

Hackles rising, I barked back, "For Pete's- I was just joking you bald idiot! Are you blind or something? Can you not comprehend body language? Jesus man! It's like I'm just some stupid, useless, weak little bug or something! Am I really that irritating? Do I really get on your nerves _that much?_ Am I... am I such a hinderence to your freaking squad? Jesus, maybe I should just join Squad Four for all you seem to think I'm worth!"

After that I shut my mouth and followed Yumichika, not once daring to meet Ikkaku's gaze.

We reached the dining hall in the 11th Division Barracks, but when Ikkaku entered, I tugged on Yumichika's sleeve.

"Aren't you coming Annalyn?" he asked.

I shook my head, "I'm honestly... not all that hungry."

Total. Lie. I was starving.

"But." I continued, "Do you guys really not want to teach me? I know for a fact that Ikkaku taught Renji, and look at him now! He's phenomenal, hands down fantastic. I know I can learn! I mean, I may not know how to fight, but that doesn't mean I don't **_want _**to learn! It doesn't..."

I let my hand drop away from him, "I doesn't mean I don't like fighting. I've seen the way you and Ikkaku fight. I've seen the way the Captain fights. It's amazing. Wonderful, even. When I see you guys fight with such passion... I can't help but smile. Seeing you guys fight makes _**me **_want to fight. It's contagious. It's beautiful. It's contagiously beautiful."

For a moment that seemed to stretch on forever, Yumichika just stood in the doorway, his head tilted slightly to the side. Perhaps he was sizing me up. Perhaps he was wondering if I was serious or not. Perhaps he was doing a lot of things, I dunno, because of the lighting I couldn't really see his face. Kinda sucked.

But whatever he was doing, I'll never know, for three guys from the 11th Division came up behind him, pulled us inside, and sat us down at the table.

Thank God. I almost went to bed hungry.

The Captain sat at the head of the long table and slowly raised his hand. The room was filled with immediate silence.

"As you all know, there was a disturbance this morning in which something escaped from Mayuri's laboratory. That something was this girl. Her name is Annalyn Vance. She's going to be staying with us for a while." he said.

He locked his gaze onto mine and spoke, "I don't care where you're from or how old you are. I don't even care that you're a girl. I only ask for one thing."

_'Oh! I remember this speech! I love this speech.'_ I thought, a wild grin forming on my face.

He regarded me for a moment before he returned my crazed grin with one of his own, "I want strength. I want you to fight. I want you to want to fight."

_'I want you to want me. I need you to need me. I love you to love me. I'm begging you to beg me.'_

Dammit, stop that. This was not the time to have songs stuck in my head. This was a serious moment here!

I stood and saluted him, "Will do sir!"

I sat down again and started eating whatever was in front of me, much of which appeared to be rice. It could've used some soy sauce, but at this point in time I was so hungry that I really didn't care. Like really, really, really didn't care. Words could not express how much I did not care.

"What happened to that 'not all that hungry' talk?" Yumichika said, a playful smile on his lips.

I shrugged, "Ehh, so I lied. I do that. Makes me human."

"Was all that other stuff a lie too?" he asked quietly.

I quickly downed a third glass of water, having turned down the offer of sake, "That is something I would never lie about. Did you know, where I come from, that unless it's professional fighting, fighting is bad? It's against the rules, and I've never been one for rule-breaking. Kinda like Byakuya, except I'm not... well, y'know... Mr. Justice-And-Upholding-Rules-At-All-Costs-Even-If-It-Makes- Me-A-Total-Jerkface. Not that he's that way now... I mean, he's gonna mellow out a bit. Over time of course."

I angrily attacked two piece of meat on my plate with my chopsticks, stabbing them on in rapid-fire succession, "And what's the point of fighting professionally? It's all rules and junk and stuff. You guys don't have any set rules. You guys don't even have any unspoken rules, and trust me, I know. I mean, there aren't many of you who would pull anything quote unquote "dirty" or "underhanded" or anything. You guys actually have a sense of honor. Honor is like chivalry where I come from. It's virtually dead. For you guys, some losers die and some losers don't. Those that don't should count themselves lucky."

"What was that?" Kenpachi said.

I looked him square in the eyes and said loud enough for all to hear, "I said that the losers who don't die should consider themselves lucky. They can live to fight again. They can grow stronger, and eventually fight the person who beat them. One should only accept death when they die, not beg for it when they're lying defeated in the dirt!"

That got Kenpachi smiling, and then he let out a low chuckle, "You're pretty smart about battle for not knowing how to fight."

"Yeah, well, I'll have to be if I'm going to start learning from the best. I mean, it's the 11th Division man, that's your guys' thing! It's what you _**do**_." I replied, as if it was obvious, which it totally was.

"Annie-Annie! You made Kenny laugh! Good job!" Yachiru said as she bounded over to me.

She squeezed in beside me and looked deep into my eyes, "You said you know about the past, present, and future, right? Tell me something!"

The room grew quiet again.

I sighed heavily, as I was sure that this probably wouldn't be the last time I was going to hear someone ask me that.

"I dunno Yachiru... I could possibly mess up your guys' time line." I said, "And I really wouldn't want to do that."

She looked puzzled for a moment, "Well what if you told us, but we just didn't do anything to try and change it? Would you tell then?"

Hmm. She did have a point. And I suppose I could be vague to a point...

_'For all I know, maybe I'm __**supposed **__to be here.'_ I thought, reflecting on the "snowball's chance in hell" reasoning I had earlier...

I slumped, "Ahh... fine then. Past, Present, or Future? And you only get one for now. And for the record, I don't know _**everything **_about _**everyone**_. _**Some **_people... I know a heckuva lot about _**some **_people. _**Not. Everything**_. Most of it being high ranking officers."

A couple people from the left of me called "Past! Past!" and a few in front of me said, "Present. Do Present."

Little Yachiru looked so cute concentrating so hard, so I said, "Okay, how about this. You get one Past, one Present, and one Future, but after that you can't bother me about it for a while, like... for a few weeks, okay?"

She nodded vigorously.

"Alright. One Past. Anyone in particular?" I asked, letting the question hang in the air for a moment, "No? Okay. Yachiru and Kenpachi met in a forest. Kenpachi had just fought and killed quite a lot ofguys, and was covered in blood, but Yachiru wasn't afraid of him. At all. It was at this point in time that Kenpachi gave her, and himself, names. You, Yachiru, hold a very important name. Treat it with the respect it deserves."

"Yay! That's right Annie!" she squealed, happily clapping her hands together, "What's next?"

I could see many of the guys in the squad staring from Yachiru to Kenpachi, who was himself staring at me very oddly. Not in a bad way, but then, not in a good way.

Which would be worse...?

"In the Present time, by now Ichigo Kurosaki has been contacted by one of the Vizards, one of the Masked Army, and is, more than likely, training with them at this very moment to control his Inner Hollow. A very difficult process, by the way." I said.

Yachiru tugged on my sleeve, "So, Ichi's getting stronger?"

I nodded, to which she replied with a giddy squeal, "Did you hear that Kenny? Ichi's getting even stronger. You guys can have more fun now!"

To this, he smiled.

_**Man**_ I love that smile! It's just so contagious!

I shrugged a shoulder, "As for the future... well, in the near future, not super close or anything, but near enough, a group of shinigami will be sent to the Living World to help look after Karakura Town, the place in which Ichigo and all of his friends live. And no, I'm not telling you who. Just that it's one captain and... five high ranking officers... I think. Let's see."

I ticked off each member of the group in my mind carefully and kept getting five, "Yep, five members. And they get to fight some pretty tough opponents."

"How tough?" one of the guys to my left said.

I snorted, "Tougher than anything you've ever faced before. I mean, seriously, you guys have never witnessed anything like these baddies in your entire life. They are **_that _**dangerous, and they're just guppies compared to the others in the far future. Those guys... if the first guys are guppies, these guys are flesh-eating whales."

Wait, did they even know what whales were? They probably knew about fish... but whales? Good thing I didn't go with Megalodon, like I wanted to. Maybe it works better, cause if the Espada higher-ups were flesh-eating whales, then Aizen himself was a Megalodon.

Hmm...

"Well!" I said, clapping my hands together once, "I'm full, what do I do with these dirty dishes?"

Yumichika shook his head and stood, "Just leave 'em and follow me."

I shrugged and got up, feeling all the eyes in the room on me.

"Goodnight Annie!" Yachiru cried as I left.

As Yumichika led me around a corner and down an incredibly long hallway to my room I said, "Man that felt strange. I definitely don't plan on doing that a whole lot, so..."

He stopped in front of a door and slid it open, "Here's your room. Mine is next to yours on the right... Ikkaku's is on the left."

"Wha? Really?" I said, a little dumbfounded.

"Yep. This one's the only open one that's not completely trashed. Rooms go in order of rank. This is the Fourth Seat's room, but-

"There is no Fourth Seat cause you wanted the Third Seat but Ikkaku has it so you chose to take the Fifth Seat because it looks like the Third Seat symbol and you think the Third Seat symbol is beautiful and there's no one who surpasses you because you're really qualified to be the Fourth Seat but you think the Fourth Seat symbol is ugly so nobody else is willing to try... to... take... it." I finished as his face took on a look of morbid curiosity.

"You really do know." he said quietly.

I shrugged, "I tried to tell you guys. Yeah, it's totally far-fetched and out there, but then again, so am I. It's... difficult... when you have all this knowledge and you want to help... but you can't because it could seriously mess things up but you really want to because you think, 'What if I'm supposed to be here?' but you're still freaking out that you might seriously mess things up. For everyone."

"So..." he started, "So you even know that Ikkaku..."

"Yes. I know. And by the way, his Bankai is amazing. Just really remarkable. It's _**so**_ super cool. I can only hope to see that bad boy in action with my own eyes one day." I said, a wide smile on my face.

"And Ai-"

"Shh!" I said quickly, closing in on the pretty-boy and firmly clamping my hand over his mouth, "I know where _he_ is too. I know everything about his place, and even where he's keeping the Hogy... the jewel... and why he needs it and when he's going to attack and where, but I..."

I removed myself from him, "I.. can't... I can't say anything. If I do, I mean, if you guys know... and you try something, like a preemptive strike or something, it could mess up everything, and it'll be all my fault! One of you guys could _**die!**_ I wouldn't be able to take it if something happened to any of you. I know it seems odd, but I've known about you guys a long time, and I care about... all of you. Even the creepy ones, surprisingly enough. In the end, its best that things run their course... without me giving anyone extensive knowledge of the future. In fact, I'm going to try as hard as I can to keep a tight, secure, stainless steel lid on it. The less I go around blabbing, the better."

"I know you can do it Annalyn." he said quietly.

The two of us entered my room and he showed me how to light the lamps. A soft glow pooled around us and he gave me a serious look.

"So the battle with him... we win?" he said.

Tentatively... I nodded, "But that's all you get to know. And you have to promise me you'll keep training. _**No matter what Yumichika!**_ You can't slack off cause you know the future. If anything, **_that's_** one of the reasons that can cause the future to **_change_**."

I sighed, "I wish there was a way to get Ikkaku to use his Bankai more though."

Yumichika smiled, "It's just his way."

Then he frowned suddenly, "Wait, why does that matter? Does something happen?

I sighed again, then nodded, "His stupid pride gets in the way and he fails. Note that I didn't say he'd die."

He let out a breath of relief, "Don't scare me like that. It's not beautiful."

I laughed a little, "Sorry, but you wanted to know. I'm trying to be... as vague as possible here, but I can't stand not telling you those kinds of details."

As he left my room I called to him, "Yumichika?"

"Yes?" he said, turning to me.

"Don't tell him. Well, don't tell anyone really, but especially not him." I said, "He... he doesn't need to know. I just thought... as his best friend... you did."

He nodded.

"Promise?" I said quietly.

"I promise, Annalyn." he replied, "Goodnight."

I smiled a small, sad little smile as I slid the door closed, "Goodnight Yumichika."

I went to bed with only one thought in my mind.

_'Who's going to teach me how to fight?'

* * *

_

_Whew!_ That. Took. Forever. Seriously man, I kept going back to check stuff, and then I'd add something, and then I'd subtract something. It's just so crazy.

M'sooo tired_._ But I'll trust that you guys will review this chapter, right? I can put that much faith into you guys... right?

_Thanks for reading! -^_^-  
_


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